I wanted to make this blog post for my readers who care and are concerned.
It just hit me this morning. Came out of almost nowhere but there was a trigger. I was telling a new person I’ve met for the second time about how much things have changed due to the new technology.
My companion told me it’s gotten so bad people are being lured into unsafe situations with a virtual game they will play on their phones, a hide and seek type game. They hunt virtual objects in the physical world.
Once upon a time, and it sure wasn’t that long ago, we were all so angry about people shouting their cel phone conversations in public. And now, gradually, but still feeling as if it was over night, most people are locked into their little smartphone screens, so much so they do this while walking, while driving and I’ve even seen someone do this on a skateboard. (Thankfully not so much with bicycle riders. *knock on wood* ) They don’t often use those phones to talk to people verbally.
Then I expressed how this epidemic was like a flood; it altered the social-landscape so drastically that a flood is a wonderful metaphor for what’s happened to almost all of us.
All of a sudden I worried about things I’d done the night before that perhaps I hadn’t remembered. Something out of my control that I had already assured myself by doing some back pedaling after I woke up. Then a feeling of anxiety hit me. It felt like an anxiety attack. I wasn’t sure.
I was working on editing Osheen’s interview for the Intro To Episode 16 last night. I thought of calling others and tried but she was the first person I reached. We only had about ten minutes but it was important to talk to her and thank her for being a friend, a real one, a human one.
Then I got in touch with another friend and we talked for hours. I finally figured out what was happening.
I am in shock.
Of all the stages of grief; I’ve ranted, raved, cried, felt angry, bargained, and now I’m deleting contacts from my mobile phone. I give them one or two weeks but if my voice mails aren’t answered I come to realize, for all intents and purposes, these friendships are gone. Gone from the new addictions in technology, gone from my social life but never from my heart. The people themselves are all alive and likely fair in health, but other wise the friendships are dead.
New ones have happened, thank Heavens, thank everything good. And this post is also to thank those people again if they see this.
I will hopefully express this more in the coming podcast and how we can help to heal, as I’m very aware I’m not the only person suffering through this loss. It’s a world wide epidemic. It’s not just me going through it, and as you probably know I care about a lot of people. I care deeply about their health and well-being, however different they are from me I always try to find what will best suit that individual for their needs.
This is likely why the fandom politics got as bad as it got for my arrival in the Dark Shadows world. There are so many people who are lonely and feel neglected, but somehow believing this state of affairs and disconnect is natural for us. Of course they’re going to be argumentative and bashing if that’s most of what they’re exposed to, sadly. I sure wouldn’t have barked back if I didn’t feel so hurt too.
One thing that is very important, and terrifyingly so, is many people are communicating inefficiently most of the time, especially now, but we’re doing it because we all have a very vital human need: each other. We need those of like-mind, we need companionship, we need social stimulus. Some people need it so bad they will attend restaurants just to chew out and swear at the staff. They’ll get it in unhealthy ways if they can’t get it in healthy ways. I’ve done that too. I was so desperate to get any discussion I even dealt with people I would never talk to or trust otherwise. Thankfully things are better enough that that has changed, but that’s how bad it got and I knew it.
I had shock for not getting the discussion, for the troubles that my work got so much silence.
I hadn’t had the shock for the friendship loss, for losing so many people so quickly, people I knew for decades, people who hated mobile phones when they came into prominence.
Even my mother told me, “You know I remember when we got answering machines and it made us crabby. We wanted to talk to a real person. Not too soon after we only wanted to talk to the machine. We didn’t want a live person anymore.” Boy! I sure remember that! (Currently I’m a little of column A and a little of column B.)
Still, it’s here. It’s real. In fact I’ve even made new friends solely because of this epidemic that’s plaguing us as a race. The name Morlock (Rising) that I use is a metaphor, not just for The Time Machine’s future by H. G. Wells, but what would happen to us. It was tongue-in-cheek. Now it’s ironically, vividly, and physically taking place.
I am hoping for change for the better. But this is part of my grief cycle. I hope it isn’t going to go on too long. It’s very painful and I feel like I want to throw-up.
Please be well, everyone. Take care of yourselves, tell your loved ones how much you love them. That’s what I’m likely doing as you read this.
And thank you, Written In Blood. You’re there for me and you were there for me when almost no one else was. You’re in my thoughts and prayers. (Hope you read this!)