The Genesis For The Pit of Ultimate Dark Shadows

Hell yeah

So, Dark Shadows… an insane and multi-layered universe to start with. The heavy stack of gothic novels inspired to create it is daunting in itself. As I finally realized, Dark Shadows is it’s own multi-fandom in that sense. But boy! Does it get startling and depressing at times. Dan Curtis… why a soap-opera? AH! I like spooky, in fact I LOVE spooky and Dark Shadows is certainly that, but also horrorific which I’m not the biggest fan toward. DARN IT! How did I get myself into this mess? Oh, yeah. The Harry Potter craze in which I got serious peer pressure to like that. I did by the third book, but then by the fifth I was ready to throw the book out the window and just about screamed, “If I wanted a spooky soap-opera I’d be watching Dark Shadows!”

Ah-ha! Mail-home DVD rentals! Now might be the time! (I didn’t make efforts previously because I’m sturdy about chronology and started with what they had. The days of Laura & Bill Malloy were not available to me yet.)

I dug in about the time my anhedonia (numbing depression) began taking hold which created an increase to my alcohol imbibing. I could drink right along with this Roger guy, no problem. 

Things kept getting worse in my life and Dark Shadows became an escape but not the kind I’d encountered before. Why do people love Barnabas Collins? He’s being so mean! By the time I became invested in the series my own troubles were slowly working out, I had a lovely home and a solid marriage even though I was still struggling through the depression.

Oh, 1795, here we go… WOW! What a wonderful man he used to be. Oh, great what’s going on now? Sheez, Widows Hill is cursed! Well, we’re back in the 1960s maybe some relationships will work out… Oops no, Angelique is back in a black wig and loud 1960s clothing. Uh-oh… what’s she doing to Sam Evans? … wait… um, no… no… NO… NO… NO!

I pull the handle of the recliner, the footrest jolted with a mighty twang and I said, “Okay, we’re gonna fix this. Where’s the fanficiton?” Well, I find the fanfiction… and no… it just gets worse… no… no… no… UGH! Where are the relief stories I’m looking for? Where are the ones where everything gets solved so I can just believe in that and carry on? Hmm… here’s a little one for Victoria… *sigh* that’s it?

All right, gotta do it myself. How the heck to get this stuff started? Well, not sure about Willie Loomis so let’s interrupt the story line at the point he went to Wyndcliff and I can bring him back later when more is worked out. And Angelique is a huge mess I’m not even sure where to start!

So I went down the line of characters: “Okay, what do you want?”

Jason: dead, gone, good, happy!

Maggie? Well it looks like you weren’t keen on Joe since you made the babyfood crack and that is rather bossy over there. Plus there are these signs your life is full of mystery and here are these other signs of a Josette reincarnation and you don’t like to be idle. Got it.

David? Oh, pretty lonely, need a friend your age, of course!

Roger? You? You need a good book! We’ll get to you more but you can already be helpful with that marvelous sense of humour!

Carolyn & Tony? No problem, when you’re squared away you can be helpful too.

Sam Evans, well we KNOW this is all for you, HEY a painter, and a Captain with a painting in the State of Maine. GOT IT!

Julia Hoffman? Well, like most of the chiks around here you want Barnabas but he’s not into you in that way, how about this other fellow of academic persuasion? When one’s love goes unrequited and another man thoughtfully allows himself the opportunity to see this and make his feelings known, what will a lady do when she’s given affection from elsewhere she never expected? You got it. Her heart melts. ^_^

Elizabeth? Victoria? A connection? OKAY! We got that down, just step over here, over here.

Oh, dear… Barnabas Collins… it’s pretty damn OBVIOUS what you want. Well now that I’ve been so dumb as to interrupt AFTER the kidnapping… Maggie? Josette? How do you feel about that?

She said, “That’s tough, but in the long run, it’ll be worth it.”

b and w heartwarm

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